Ooooh do we have a fun contest this week. From Thursday May 18th at Noon (12pm) PST until the following Thursday May 24th at Noon (12pm) PST, the model with the HIGHEST OVERALL SALES for the period will win …

A FULL-SIZE, HIGH-QUALITY, HAND-FORGED, AMERICAN-MADE FUCK MACHINE. These suckers are beautiful little machines and retail for $900+. Since?these machines are large, they?can?only ship to the U.S. – that means this contest is for U.S. Models Only.

In association with Fuck Machine Industries, here’s a fun little demo video of the machine in action – just think of all the cool new content you can make with it :